Diskografie


 

If Winter Ends

I dreamt of a fever, one that would cure me of this cold, winter-set heart
With heat to melt these frozen tears, burned with reasons as to carry on
Into these twisted months I plunge without a light to follow
But I swear that I would follow anything
Just get me out of here
But you get six months to adapt, and you get two more to leave town
And in the event that you do adapt, we still might not want you around
But I fell for the promise of a life with a purpose
But I know that that's impossible now
And so I drink to stay warm, and to kill selected memories
'Cause I just can't think anymore about that, or about her tonight
I give myself three days to feel better
Or else I swear I'm driving off a fucking cliff
'Cause if I can't make myself feel better
How can I expect anyone else to give a shit?
And I scream for the sunlight, or a car to take me anywhere
Just get me past this dead and eternal snow
'Cause I swear that I'm dying, slowly but it's happening
And if the perfect spring is waiting somewhere
Just take me there, and lie to me and say it's gonna be all right
It's gonna be all right, yeah you worry too much kid
It's gonna be all right


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Padraic My Prince


I had a brother once
He drowned in a bathtub before he'd ever learned how to talk
And I don't know what his name was but my mother does, I heard her say it once
Padraic my prince, I have all but died from the sheer weight of my shame
You cried but no one came and the water filled your tiny lungs
Appear, my dear, and sing to me
It was six years ago today that we laid you in your grave
Your sweet young skin was shining then too
And so tonight to celebrate i will poison myself
Another coughing, shaking fit in a bathroom that is spinning
So I close the door and rest my head on the tile floor
Sickness and sleep turning me cold
I'm still not sure, is there some better place I should be heading towards?
Where the selfishly sick and self-absorbed are welcome
I saw the future once, I was drunk in a phone booth
My eyes were wet and red, but I could not tell what was said
And through the screams of the traffic voices carried
Saying I'm sorry
On a day so gray it's black inside, watching churches on TV
In a coma you don't dream, you just hope that someone sits with you
Babies turn blue when they're ignored like the sky on summer days
Before you turn and walk away it has changed you
So tonight to compensate I will poison myself
Another coughing, shaking fit in a bathroom that is spinning


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Contrast and Compare


Contrast and compare
Between the busy ones, and the ones that don't care
Until there is no one that you really know
So I drift through these days of appointments and promises made
They will all end up broken and quickly replaced
Weeks are slow, days drag on
Even practice and parties seem long, but I find myself going
I guess there's nothing to do... oh well
Group of kids, line of cars, more will show up after the bars close
There's this boredom that drowns everything
Bottles break, music plays, conversations competing for space
I look for a corner or a quieter room
There's no heat in this house, I can't breathe with these words in my mouth
But I'm not going to say them
Yeah, I've made that mistake before
On the stairs, she grabs my arm
Says whats up, where you been, is something wrong?
I try to just smile, and say everything's fine


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The City Has Sex


The city has sex with itself I suppose
As the concrete collides, the scenery grows
And the lonely once bandaged lay fully exposed
Having exposed their wounds for each other
And there's a boy in a basement with a four track machine
He's been strumming and screaming all night, down there
The tape hiss will cover the words that he sings
But they say it's better to bury your sadness
In a graveyard or garden that waits for the spring
To awake from its sleep and burst into green
And I've cried and you would think I'd feel better for it
But the sadness just sleeps and it stays in your spine for the rest of your life
And I've learned and you'd think I'd be something more now
But it just goes to show it is not what you know
It's what you were thinking at the time
This feeling's familiar, I've been here before
In a kitchen this quiet I waited for a sign
Or just something that might reassure me
Of anything close to meaning or motion, with a reason to move
I need something I want to be close to
And I scream, but I still don't know why I do it
Because the sound never stays, it just swells and decays
So what is the point?
Why try to fight what is now so certain?
The truth is all that I am is a passing event
That will be forgotten


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The Difference in the Shades


Now that it's June, we'll sleep out in the garden
And if it rains, we'll just sink into the mud
Where it is quiet and much cooler than the house is
And there's no clocks or phones to wake us up
Because I have learned that nothing is as pressing
As the one who's pressing would like you to believe
And I'm content to walk a little slower
Because there's nowhere that I really need to be
And I find that life is easier when it's just a blur
With no details to confuse who or what or where I was
So when the ending comes the full regret will seem obscure
But these are days we dream about when the sunlight paints us gold
And this apartment could not be prettier
As we dance up there alone
And this TV's old, the color's fucked, do you see the difference in the shades?
But the green's still close to green, my love
And I believe we are the same
And we'll stay like this, all gold and green
Light collects and projects your heart on a movie screen
And if you close your eyes, we will always be
The way we were that night you crawled inside of me
And you slept in my blood the way you sleep now
The quietest hush has consumed this house
And when the doctors have gone and you sweat through the bed
With the pictures and pills they piled around your head
Just rest now, and in a moment you'll know everything
Was it all a dream?
It's too vague now to recount
An outline of the one you loved
In a life that was, that no longer will be
Stands above you as you sleep


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Touch


Touch, lying on the floor
Wishing this could last, knowing that it can't
And soon you will leaveAnd I'll be on the floor, watching the TV
Trying hard to find a reason to move
I'm frozen in one place, staring at the screen
Listening to the rain falling on the street
Some days go on too long, and no one can hang out tonight
Here, where the carpet's cool and soft
Underneath the clock I feel my weary heart is put to rest
You gather around your friends, the connection that you feel
When the night has not yet died
You are new, with the promise of a love you'll probably never find
And a touch that you can really feel
The brokenness inside as hope and this collide
And nothing is real
Oh, there's nothing more I want
Than just one night that's free of doubt and sadness
One night, one night, that I can really feel


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June on the West Coast


I spent a week drinking the sunlight of Winnetka, California
Where they understand the weight of human hearts
See, sorrow gets too heavy and joy it tends to hold you
With the fear that it eventually departs
And the truth is I've been dreaming of some tired tranquil place
Where the weather won't get trapped inside my bones
And if all these years of searching find one sympathetic face
Then it's there I'll plant these seeds and make my home
I spent a day dreaming of dying in Mesa, Arizona
Where all the green of life had turned to ash
And I felt I was on fire, with the things I could have told you
I just assumed that you eventually would ask
And I wouldn't have to bring up my so badly broken heart
And all those months I just wanted to sleep
And though spring, it did come slowly, I guess it did its part
My heart has thawed and continues to beat
And I visited my brother on the outskirts of Olympia
Where the forest and the water become one
And we talked about our childhood, like a dream we were convinced of
The perfect, peaceful street that we came from
And I know he heard me strumming all those sad and simple chords
As I sat inside my room so long ago
And it hurts that he's still shaking from those secrets that were told
By a car closed up too tight and a heart turned cold
And I went to San Diego, and the birthplace of the summer
And watched the ocean dance under the moon
There was a girl I knew there, one more potential lover
I guess that something's gotta happen soon
'Cause I know I can't keep living in this dead or dying dream
And as I walked along the beach and drank with her
I thought about my true love, the one I really need
With eyes that burn so bright, they make me pure
They make me pure, they make me pure
I long to be with you
They make me pure, they make me pure
I long to be with you


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Pull My Hair


Is the passion all gone?
Or is it still newly-wed?
If all this heat's doing is making us stick to the bed
Then there is no life to revive
But if the hunger's still there, hidden somewhere inside
Covered up by the boredom we've been trying to hide
Then dig it up and devour it
And it'll be more like a song
And less like it's math
When you pull on my hair, and bite me like that
And the truth is that I can't hardly wait
And I don't care if we stay up too late
Don't answer the phone, don't answer the phone
And it'll be more like a song
And less like it's math
When you pull on my hair, and bite me like that
And the truth is that I can't hardly wait
It's so bad I can't concentrate
Don't answer the phone, don't answer the phone
And it'll be more like a song
And less like it's math
When you pull on my hair, and bite me like that


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A Poetic Retelling of an Unfortunate Seduction


The language in the dimmer rooms seems to represent the light source well
How soft they speak and seem to be at peace
With the music and the madness that is pulling me into this
And the shades of the lamps are woven red
The light, it stains and consecrates
Anointing all forgotten forms that swirl and smoke and haunt this place
The girls in gowns all nurse the dark, pulling it near to their swelling breasts
And watch as it seeps to their hearts, and beats within their virgin chests
And here I know seduction breeds from wanton hearts that would seduce
And grows and spreads its vine and leaves
Embracing those who might have moved
But now remain to drink the night from vials black and thick
With intoxicating delights that would leave you drunk inside this dream
And you watch them take the light from you
And you find yourself on a velvet couch
Tasting the skin of a foreign girl
Her eyes are black and wet like oil
And she ties your hands with a string of pearls
And you tremble like a frightened bird as she closes in and captures you
To place you in a silver cage deep within her poisoned womb
And once you're safe inside
She might let you out to fly in circles around the room
But it's always night and there is no moon
And you wonder if you're still alive, and you�re not sure if you want to be
But you drank her sweat like it was wine, and you lay with her on a bed of blue
And it's awful sweet, like the fruit she cuts and feeds to you


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Tereza and Tomas


Let's sail away, past the noise of the bay
Let's sail away, past the birth and death of the day
Let's sail away, to where the blues and greens swirl into gray
Let's sail away
Let's sail away, past the cradle of these waves
Let's sail away, past the tide and its slow decay
Let's sail away, to where the water goes, some endless open space
Let's sail away
Take only what you need, my love, and leave the rest behind
Don't be afraid of where we'll go, my love, I promise we'll be fine
Now you are the only one that's mine
Let's sail away, past the reflections of the light
Let's sail away, floating weightless through the night
Let's sail away, like a photograph, fading to all white
It's finally all right
Forget all the mistakes, my love, they won't be made again
Leave the photos in the drawer, my love, we no longer need them
We both know where we've been
Let's sail away, disappearing in the mist
Let's sail away, with a whisper and a kiss
Or vanish from a road somewhere, like Tereza and Tomas
Suspended in this bliss

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